Saturday, February 14, 2015

I'm Not an Alcoholic (I Just Play One on TV)

After writing my last post and reading the comments, I've been thinking a lot about the word alcoholic and everything associated with it.  These are not new thoughts, in fact I knew I had blogged about this very topic very early on.  I went back to check and it was on day 5!  Day early on, yet I feel exactly the same on this topic today.  Here is what I wrote back in October:

So, I’ve often thought about the “A” word (alcoholic…there I said it), and have all kinds of thoughts about it. As I was emptying the dishwasher just now I had the scariest thought yet and feel like I need to write about it NOW.

Of course I don’t want to be an alcoholic…who does? I have no problem saying I have a problem with alcohol or a drinking problem. Better yet I can say that I drink alcoholically or that I have an alcoholic mind. But to say “My name is ______ and I’m an alcoholic” …nope can’t do that. Me? Hell no. But that’s not the scary part. I just had a vision of one of my kids saying “My mom’s an alcoholic”. If I want to screw up my own life that’s one thing but to put that kind of stigma on them hardly seems fair. I really don’t like the word and what’s associated with it and honestly can’t say if I am or not. Do I live under a bridge? No. Have I ever had a DUI? No. Do I drink every day? No. Do I consistently drink more that I want to or intend to. Yes. Do I wake up in the middle of the night feeling anxious, shameful, embarrassed and just plain disgusted with myself after a night of drinking. Yes. Am I always the one who drinks more than everyone else? Yes. What does it all mean? As they say, if the shoe fits…

I still feel the same, I don't like the word.  I'm I need to get to the place where I can admit it or does it matter?  I feel like I'm doing pretty well and after all...IT'S JUST A WORD!  I'd love to hear everyone's thoughts and opinions on this.


  1. I think if doing really well, then the label is not worth worrying about. And for sure you're doing really, really well. So hooray you! I know eventually I have found the word "alcoholic" helpful for me, but that took quite a while, and before that, the word just represented too many things I wanted to argue about, which was just a waste of my energy. So you might rethink it, or you might not. In any case, you're grand now and that's fantastic! xo

    1. Thanks. It feels good to hear someone say what I wanted to hear :)

  2. I am not ready to say that outloud to anyone. happy doing what I am doing. labels are just words!

  3. Dear TMSN,
    To me what matters is not a word, but rather if you are staying sober and making life better for yourself and people you love.
    Peace and Hugs,

  4. I don't think it matters. I don't think I'm an alcoholic, infact I know I'm not. That doesn't mean I didn't drink too much. For me and I suspect for a lot of people alcohol became a bad habit, giving it up is still a worthwhile thing to do. I eat too much sugar too but I am not physically addicted to it. Just my thoughts anyway....Putting down the glass.