Thursday, November 20, 2014


Something is starting to click in my brain just a little bit.  Of course I know I have a problem with alcohol...that's why we're here.  But as I've been listening to podcasts from Belle and The Bubble Hour, and also connecting with people in the Booze Free Brigade (BFB), I am realizing that others with alcohol issues also have similar personality characteristics.  Things like being a people pleaser, getting overwhelmed easily, being controlling, all or nothing thinking, low self-esteem, social awkwardness, perfectionism.  I was under the impression that alcohol was the problem, but there are so many other areas of myself that need work.  This is maybe a slightly depressing realization because of course I have no idea how to make these things better.

But as Dr. Phil would say, "you can't change what you don't acknowledge."  Figuring out what I need to work on has to be a good first step, right?

There is a quote that stuck out in my mind from Fifty Shades of Grey.  (Yes I read it...didn't you?)  Christian tells Anastasia, "Because I'm fifty shades of fucked-up."  I guess it stayed in my mind because I feel like it applies to me. 

Ok, so now what?


  1. I'm back and on day 5. No longer completely anonymous :-) it's hard today. But I feel better because this sounds so like me and I'm not alone.

    1. I saw your blog and we have so much in common! I agree it feels so much better not to feel alone!

  2. That's interesting, that sounds just like me. Especially the all or nothing thinking. In my alcohol free periods this year I have noticed that I'm an introvert. good old Dr Phil is right. I tend to overthink things then get overwhelmed. I have no idea how to fix stuff like that either. I guess just realising it is a start :) L Putting Down The Glass